Source: Dona Matthews
I often worry about the increasing mental health problems among children and young people. I know that the best solutions are long-term and target the root causes of the problems. When implemented, these solutions lead to a healthier society. They mean addressing problems like poverty, gun violence, social media influence, educational inequality, environmental degradation, climate change, and more.
Changing the world in this way may sound huge, but you can take small actions to increase the likelihood that your child will become at least somewhat resilient to the stressors around them and that they will acquire the skills and attitudes they need to be among the people making a difference and working toward those long-term solutions. One of these low-effort, high-reward actions is to create space in your child’s life for spontaneity, self-discovery, and creativity.
Long, lazy days with no appointments can be catalysts for self-discovery and creativity, and I recently had an experience that illustrates exactly what I’m talking about. My 9-year-old granddaughter spent a few days with my husband and me this summer. Zoe enjoys trips to the local landfill, where we bring bottles to be recycled as well as trash or other recyclables that weren’t picked up at the weekly pickup. Her favorite place at the landfill is the re-use shed, where people leave their books, toys, and household items they no longer need. Over the years, she’s found many treasures there, and I’ve found a few good things, too.
During this visit to the dump, Zoe’s eye fell on a large old wicker basket. “Look, Nonna! There’s a picnic basket there!” she said excitedly. “Can we take it with us?”
I said ok and she said, “Can we have a picnic for lunch today?”
It was about 11am on a hot, sunny day. We were going to do some grocery shopping next and had the luxury of not having any set plans for the rest of the day. I liked the idea of a picnic and said yes.
When we arrived at the supermarket, Zoe had a complete list in her head of what we would need for the old-fashioned picnic of her imagination: a baguette, cheese, salami, green salad and a fruit platter. She carefully selected each of these items, consulting with me on details such as spices and pack size.
Back home, we sliced the bread, carefully placed our purchases in the basket, and considered what else we would need. We put some butter and mustard in the basket and packed cutlery, napkins, and lightweight bamboo plates. We poured drinks into travel mugs and got a blanket to sit on. I suggested we find a spot in our own garden where we would have the luxury of chairs and other amenities, but that wasn’t what Zoe had in mind. For it to be the picnic of her dreams, it couldn’t be at home. Rocks, trees, nature, maybe a view of the water.
I knew a spot that I thought was an easy walk, near a public jetty where we would have a view of the nearby lake, and we set off. With our heavy picnic basket and bag of drinks on a hot summer day, the walk seemed ten times further than I had thought, but after several stops to rest, we arrived. We discussed possible spots for the picnic. I liked the jetty (which is rarely used) because it was flat and less likely to have ants, but Zoe preferred a spot under the trees on the nearby grass. Yes, it was sloping, rocky and uneven, but it was shady and there was no chance anyone would come by and ask us to move. I reminded myself that this picnic was hers, not mine, so we rolled out the blanket on the grassy slope and laid out our picnic.
We filled our plates and Zoe found a comfortable place to rest. There was even a nice big rock for her grandfather to sit on when he arrived a few minutes later. She looked out over the lake, sighed contentedly and said, “There’s nowhere better for a picnic.”
The ants let us enjoy the picnic long enough before they attacked us with a vengeance. As we packed everything back into the new old basket, we agreed that it had been a wonderful, perfect way to spend part of our day.
I am writing about Zoe’s picnic to show what can happen when you create space for creative opportunity in your child’s life and in your own. I have written elsewhere about the feeling of flow associated with creativity, the experience of being totally absorbed in an activity, an experience that leads to a sense of happiness, calm and fulfillment. I think that is exactly how Zoe and I felt as we packed up our things to go home.
Important reading on creativity
Zoe’s picnic illustrates how creativity happens when a child finds something that sparks their interest. It highlights the importance of an adult paying attention to the child’s curiosity and enthusiasm. It also shows the importance of letting the child choose the goals, activities, and products. You can provide valuable support with your interest and encouragement, but do your best not to take over the child’s ideas.
By giving your child opportunities to express themselves creatively – whether it’s through writing, painting, drama, role playing, music, puppetry, dancing or picnicking – you will build their wellbeing and resilience and increase the likelihood that they will build a happy and productive life. You will help your child develop the skills and attitudes they need to make a difference and make the world a safer and healthier place for everyone.
