At 53, my hair is limp, dead and stunted. Its texture has gone from soft and shiny to limp at the roots, with hideous, frizzy strands in the middle and at the ends. It’s so horrible that I keep tying it back all the time – not a good sign.

Desperate, I put myself in the hands of 57-year-old Zoe Irwin, a champion of midlife hair fashion, creative director at John Frieda and the woman behind 52-year-old Lisa Snowdon’s timeless curls. Zoe’s problem with midlife hair is that too many women feel forced to wear lighter hair when it doesn’t suit them, while others become “flashy brunettes.” It’s clear which category I fall into.

Although I have very little grey, I used crude lamination techniques, resulting in a dried, porous block of inky, oversaturated colour.

Many women feel compelled to lighten their hair in middle age if it does not suit them

I’ve fallen into a midlife crisis: I take care of my skin, but allow my hair to fall out.

I’m by no means alone in this. This has given rise to the trend known as “skinifying” hair, giving it the attention we give to our face and boosting it with skin-enhancing ingredients like peptides, hyaluronic acid, collagen and niacinamide.

Now Zoe has developed a spa-style anti-aging facial for your hair that will detoxify your scalp and strengthen your hair by building in layers of moisture. And even better, Zoe will teach you the treatments so you can replicate her methods at home.

Cleanse and exfoliate

Rehab begins with a Virtue Exfoliating Scalp Treatment (now £38.40, sephora.co.uk), scented with lavender, chamomile and sandalwood.

Zoe’s technique is not a scrubbing motion, but a firm, scalp-moving kneading motion, with the treatment’s rice beads stimulating circulation and growth. By lifting a T-section and massaging in Virtue’s Alpha Keratin formula, a facial cream-like repair is achieved.

Massage and moisturize

The next step is a moisturising treatment, which is to moisturise the areas that need it – in my case the middle and ends – without covering the roots. I cover the backs and fronts of my hands with Virtue Restorative Treatment Mask (£25.60, sephora.co.uk) and work it into the ends and then the middle.

Here, too, I section off the T-section where the hair is most damaged and massage moisture into the lengths of my hair to restore its suppleness.

Zoe also reviews Pureology’s nourishing Hydrate Superfood Deep Treatment Mask (now £27.80, sephora.co.uk) and Beauty Pie’s vegan Super Health Hair keratin mask (members £14, non-members £35, beautypie.com).

Then we rinse and repeat the process with the Olaplex No. 8 Bond Intense Moisture Mask (£28, sephora.co.uk), which we press into the damaged areas for ten minutes.

The most sophisticated color

Only now, as my hair begins to renew itself, is Zoe even beginning to think about color – with the most nuanced accents.

To give the look a multi-dimensional effect, she covers the smallest micro sections at the roots of the hair with multiple depths of a permanent dark brown color and mixes it with a deep ash shine.

For a home version, try Josh Wood Colour Permanent Hair Dye in 5.5 Brown (£14, Boots.com) with Josh Wood Hair Gloss in Smoky Brunette (£19, joshwoodcolour.com). Further down the hair, she then applies a conditioning semi-permanent clear glaze. Glaze Super Color Conditioning Gloss in Sheer Glow (£15.99, Superdrug) offers a DIY version.

It will take some time for my curls to come back to life, but the effect is youthful from the start: the difference between a dense, lacquer-like color and a smoother, pastel look; the face looks infinitely better.

I’m about to become one of those demanding women who is always hanging around the salon. But when you’re pampered so exquisitely during these visits, it’s no punishment. All that head massage is also making my facial skin glow, so I should look more alert overall.

Have a race against the other!

Boy Brow, the brush-on grooming pomade, is Glossier’s cult product, youth in a tube. Now meet Glossier Boy Brow Arch (£24, ukglossier.com): pomade in a pen. It looks soft and realistic and offers precision, with a sharp edge for fine lines and a flat one for filling in the shape. Waterproof, smudge-proof, in nine warm and cool shades, including grey.

My icon of the week: Emma Willis

Emma Willis presents the reality TV series Love Is Blind: UK on Netflix

TV presenter Emma Willis, 48, is a fan of Absolute Collagen Marine Collagen (from £27, absolutecollagen.com) and Dermaceutic Sun Ceutic SPF 50+ (£28.80, cosmetify.com). She loves Charlotte Tilbury Pillow Talk Push Up Lashes in Brown (£28, charlottetilbury.com) and Hello Sunday Lipbalm SPF 50 (£7, Boots.com) to prevent cold sores.

Desire for cosmetics

Sunspel Sea Moss Eau de Parfum (from £80, sunspel.com)

British supplier Sunspel produces four fragrances that pay homage to our national landscape.

Oak Wood conjures up its forests, Green Cedar its lush spring breezes, Neroli Sun its sun-drenched summers and Sunspel Sea Moss Eau de Parfum (from £80, sunspel.com) its coastline.

(Try them all in the Sunspel Eau de Parfum gift set, £125.) Created by Lyn Harris, formerly of Miller Harris, ‘Sea Moss’ is a more masculine, British take on Miller Harris’ late, great ‘Fleurs de Sel’: a beautiful beach walk, all driftwood, salty sea air and wildflowers.

I’m not going away this August, so this is my summer vacation – a mood-lifting herbal tonic full of airy, mossy serenity.